Religion Not Always the Driving Force

In a study of college students, there was a slight correlation between altruism and belief in God. Nonbelievers, nearly as frequently, rated as good Samaritans, having love and compassion for their fellow man, and being humble as the most devout. In a study of college students, their religious beliefs had little to do with their honesty.

These findings really didn’t surprise me. I do think there is often a connection or belief that those who are religious practice positive values. Sort of a “he’s religious ergo he must have good values.” I don’t immediately make that connection but many do and I sort of find it disappointing that people’s immediate thought is to associate positive values with being religious. Religion can and often does reinforce the practice of positive values but it is not the only means of getting a positive message or education about the importance of being a good person with a sound moral compass. I personally would not point to religion as having a strong influence one way or another on my values. I believe there are many people making poor values choices out there who attend religious services regularly – as many as those who do not regularly attend religious services of some sort.

When it comes to me personally, my values grounding came from my parents and it was reinforced along the way by peers, teachers, community members, things I read about or witnessed on my own. I did go to church regularly until I was about 10 years old but when I resisted continuing my parents let me make that choice. My parents felt it important for us, their children, to be exposed to religion but also made it clear that they did not feel going to church was required in order practice a religion, to have faith, to be a good person or to pray. We could be a part of a congregation if we wanted to or it could be more personal if that was our choice. My brother and sister chose to be more involved in church life than I did and my parents let us make those choices. Whatever values lessons my parents felt needed to be imparted were done by them and while church perhaps did or would have reinforced those lessons it was not there that I received that reinforcement – at least not beyond my 10th year.

In my house honesty, kindness and respect were the main values that were underscored by my parents. That’s not to say that other values weren’t stressed and reinforced but those were the big three. Not a whole lot of second chances were given when you were dishonest, unkind or disrespectful. You were punished – first time offenders were not given a break. Their message was clear – these were unacceptable behaviors and would in no way be overlooked. I might get away with arriving home ten or fifteen minutes past my curfew but had I been dishonest about what made me late (usually my just losing track of time or trying to eke out a few more moments of fun on my Friday night), then I was in trouble. My parents didn’t expect me to always agree with them but they always expected me to be respectful in my disagreement. And if I were to be caught being unkind to anyone – person or animal – there was a lecture for sure and then some consequence.

My parents pointed out when these values were practiced in a positive way or in a negative one wherever they were witnessed. They made sure we knew what was the right or wrong way to behave and what making the wrong choice would result in – normally some sort of grounding – no phone, no car, no going out on the weekends, you know, pretty much unimaginable stuff for a teenager (the years when these values needed the most reinforcement). Somehow they made us see how our positive behaviors reflected positively on others and how the opposite was also true.

The reinforcement didn’t just come from my parents, although they were the primary educators and models for us to follow. I had friends, parents of friends, teachers, coaches, family friends, relatives, and others who mostly set positive values examples. I had friends who got in trouble for lying and being disrespectful – they weren’t getting away with that either. I had teachers who called kids out on disrespectful and uncivil behaviors. I remember being shocked at how rude and unkind some kids were to their elders or people in authority and thought it such ugly behavior. Seeing the bad had an impact too – I didn’t want to be viewed the way I viewed some of my classmates. I had coaches who stressed how important it was to have strong character – forget about winning (although that was highly encouraged and exalted when it occurred) – being a good sport, a good person was a requirement. I am not sure that is still stressed as much today but it should be. I had an incredible ‘support network’ when it came to positive values reinforcement. I was taught well by my parents and in many ways probably got lucky with the positive examples I had to follow, which I feel were many. I am certain many of the people setting positive examples for me were having their positive values practice reinforced by others, including their church leaders if they attended church, and all of the other connections in their lives.

Our values lie within us and there are many ways by which the practice of positive values can be reinforced. Religious teachings can and do reinforce the practice of positive values but it is just one means of getting that reinforcement, not the only means. This tells me that folks who go to church regularly may be honest or dishonest as much of the time as those who don’t. Why? Because, as I said, religion is just but one means of receiving a positive message. If you don’t regularly attend religious services but have positive influences in your life then aren’t you just as likely to practice positive values as those who attend religious services regularly and also have positive influences in their lives? It would reason that those who are regularly exposed to negative values examples, perhaps seeing people getting away with lying, cheating or being dishonest in other ways, may be more likely to emulate those behaviors themselves regardless of whether they attend regular religious services. Religion can strongly reinforce positive values practice but it cannot alone keep folks on track if the other influences in their lives are not so positive. I am all for what helps reinforce the practice of positive values. Religion may have a positive influence on one’s values but I don’t think it is a requirement. I believe we can all be good people practicing positive values with or without it.

What do you think? Do the findings in the study of college students and their honesty surprise you? Why? What or who influences your practice of positive values?